i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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