I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
