He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Randomize
