Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
