We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
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He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
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so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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