I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize