Don't you send me to vm
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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