check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I wear drunk well.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize