**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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