I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
