So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
