He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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