He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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