Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
