she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!