No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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