he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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