barbara walters just said penis...
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
