Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
