How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
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And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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