And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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