I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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