gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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