You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize