she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
