I think scott just propositioned me for sex
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
