oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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