Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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