wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
