Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
