Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
The feeling are messing with the penis
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
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