Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
A bitchslap is in order.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
