But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
