As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize