I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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