EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize