K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Say something about gay babies.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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