I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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