So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
