I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
