she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
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