He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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