Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
