this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
