Dual....:-)
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
