you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
