this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
