Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
the liver wants what the liver wants
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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