The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
