I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
