How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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