I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
sex in a hospital.. check
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
